The Complaints Continue

I promised to continue my list of pregnancy not-so-pleasantries (Note: it appears I'm very good at making up words these days, bare with me).
Where did I leave off? Huh-hmmmmmm (me clearing my throat so my fingers can type better)...

5. Knocking items over with my belly. This is truly inconvenient since I also have a terrible time getting down to the floor to pick up said items. Once on the floor, it takes me a solid 60 seconds to get back up. It's sort of like I forgot how to drive and end up doing a 20-point turn to get out of my parking spot. Needless to say, I avoid the floor unless I have something to help me up. I digress, back to the belly...

Let me exemplify the belly problem by sharing a recent incident. A few nights ago a storm moved in pretty quickly. I was in the kitchen making dinner. Once I heard the raindrops I headed upstairs to close the windows with a tall glass of OJ in my hand (don't ask why I was carrying this with me, I apparently forgot to put the glass down). Once I reached the bedroom, I was winded because stairs are evil and Mark is not yet convinced we need an elevator. Although breathless and fatigued, the catlike agility I have developed since becoming pregnant can only explain what was to happen next. I carefully place my glass of OJ on the night stand and gracefully reached to close the window. Success, no rain in this room. As I turned to the leave the room, forgetting my OJ, my belly ever so delicately brushed the glass. The aroma of fresh oranges filled the room as my feet and newly cleaned carpet were dowsed in my precious OJ...it was the last glass by the way.

I cried. OK I didn't, but I wanted to.

Later I reflected on this and I realized I should be thankful that I'm too short to clear most of the surfaces in my house with the belly. Another perk of being short. Then I got to thinking some more (dangerous, I know). Do you think it's possible with my ever increasing size, gravity will have a greater effect drawing me closer to the ground? Will pregnancy make me shorter? If so, will my next blog tell the tale of my belly clearing the coffee table as I walk by? Hmmm...this would be unfortunate.

Aren't you happy you're not my brain? Its filled all sorts of nonsense.